29.1.06

fart fart fart.

hohohohohoh!
yesterday was fine. a fine day, it was yesterday.
1) went out with my younger sister to far east plaza (SAAAAAP! DIA BELI BAJU UNDEROATH SIAK!) and then to peninsula.

2) saw a couple of pakcik2 metal and rockers in LaVanita!!! aku sukaaaaaa! hohohohohohohohohohh. managed to talk to some pakcik2 there, gua respect dok!!

3) met hubby for a while. although we met for 20minutes, its worth it. im sure you have fun swimming looking for crabs and fishing!!! muuaks!

ouh ouh ouh.
call me a Guardian Girl again. im starting back again. full time.
i miss my LesPaully oh la la. my other husband. hohohoh.

anyway, HANDSOME SIAL SI DEKNI! expert pulak tu!! Alexi Laiho of Children of Bodom............bf's idol. i have confidence in you, that you'll be like him 1 day. gogogo!!!

:: she posted @ 4:59 AM ::

24.1.06

depression day.

there will come a point in life when you wake u from hours of sleep, and usually you know what to do straightaway, but this time, YOU DONT.
slept from 8.30pm yesterday and woke up at 6.45am today, because i have a massive headache or migraine (they both sound the same). usually when i wake up i know what to do. take out my clothes, bathe, get ready for work then breakfast then im out to work. but today is different. although the dizziness of the headache remains, i just could not bring myself up and get ready. my head was swimming with questions. questions that always appear whenever im clueless about my life.
do you still want to do this?
are you sure this is what you're going to do for the rest of your life?
is this what your life supposed to be? or is it like this because you want it to be?
are you doing this just because its work and it means money?
is work your life?
are you really, really secure and sure about everything that you have done or are doing in your life?
are you even sure about anything?..............

today is the day where i wake up, sit, and just stare at the mirror thats facing me on my sisters bed. i look like shit, and i feel like it. for the first time in my entire life, im completely clueless, depressed and feeling pointless at the same time. im sure everyone will at a certain point of their lives. i mean, everyone has feelings unless they are robots at hearts. ruthless people.
something is telling me something is wrong somewhere.
but i just could not put my finger on it and know what it is.
im even crying when i read this to my bf and he was shocked.
trust me, i was also shocked at the reaction that i cried while reading this.
zombified, almost.

:: she posted @ 12:51 AM ::

10.1.06

the recovery.

hey ho! lets go!
yeah im back with more action. its been like...urm..i dunno...since i last update. i can even wipe of the pile of dust away from this blog. hohohoh! ok reizo and ayoshi, enough pestering, im updating!
i know its kinda late, but what the heck...HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! and today is hari raya haji. SLAMAT HARI RAYA HAJI YOU ALL!!!!! hohohoh. for those who msged me back, " sembelih kambeng, minum darah kambeng...black metal!!!!"...you guys are...gerek!!! hohohoh. im not a fan of black metal actually. pure metal is the original stuff mann!!
hari raya haji is the mark where we, my whole family, have to use public transport after so long using a car, to my grandparents house in marine parade!!!! the mother and father was soooo jakun...hehehehe! sorry guys. the trip there was soo droning.
hari raya haji? it was short. full stop.
im kinda cooped up with alotta work...school work...and i barely have time for myself.
need more?
the picture below says it all.



till then!

:: she posted @ 6:27 AM ::